Like Sands Thru The Hour Glass.....................

I'll tell you one thing for free........... Nothing worthwhile happens overnight!! If any of you expected to see a whole bunch of blogging going on everyday for the past 'little' while then you spend far too much time on google and your facebook and not enough time getting what needs doing done!!!

Man, I can't believe it's been two years since a post was posted on this pesky thing. Best thing though is that for the 5 million or so loyal viewers, this is as good as a beetles reunion or the ressurection of 2Pac........Hahahaha, I wish.

Nonetheless,The Colonel & The Commodore & The Dcap, take great pleasure in bringing to you what may be considered the Wildchaps Revival Tour. Starting May 2010, we pledge to bring to you the latest and greatest of the Zambezi Valley. The Ups, the downs, The highs & lows, The Skinder & Scandal. We gonna hold no punches, give it to you raw and unscensored. These are after all , The Days of Our Lives!!!!

Willie WalliT'll be comin out the woodwork too, more wordly and more epically eccentric than ever before. He promises me that he has scoured the continent of Zambia for some of the juiciest little tit-bits and will entrigue us with each and every story.

At the end of the day though, I was going thru some of the stuff I've jotted down over the past while and came across the following little piece that I put together a while ago. It still stands true, and possibly more so today than ever before. Thought It might be worth the read. Hope Y'all enjoy.
Take it easy. If you can't take it easy, play it safe.....and if you can't play it safe.............Buy a Pram!!!

The Commodore;))


THE EVOLUTION OF THINGS.....................

Good old Charlie Darwin & his Cronies spent a whole bunch of months sitting on a boat coming up with the whole theory that for anything to survive in its environment it needed to change and adapt. Well kind of. The intracacies of C.D's whole theory is too taxing on my keyboard co-ords and well, just too intellectual to go into on this little brain vomit of ours. However, just like Charlie and his mates, I've spent a little time on a boat pondering The Evolution of Things. 'Things' generally being 'WildTracks'. And this is where things have led:

It's often difficult at close range, to see whether or not you're getting somewhere with something or not. It's that whole 'bigger picture' or 'wood from the trees' idea. When you eventually take a little bit of a step back, BAMM!! Suddenly it'll smack you up the left side of the head. Today's been kinda lke that. If you spend the whole of a public holiday traipsing about getting yourself in a Tizz about the stoopid pumps that leak and the patchy lawn or 'things' still to be done or better yet the lazy chaps you employ, you can feel.....well, BAD. But! Sit back in the evening and drift past it all on the boat & By Cheesus it's coming on!

It's taken some time, it's taken some effort. But, I think that with an extra bit, it can and will be something! And that's all I have to say about that

Can you believe that with a break from blogging of goodness knows how long, that's just about all I have news on. Over the past months, I've barely had time to wet a line, squeazed a few school groups through & pretty much spent the better part of everyday putting stuff together or on the road. Been fun though!!

The time I have spent on the water has been well spent though. Have taken some killer pics with my new toy(and missed a few too). But although I'll never admit that there are other ways apart from fishing to enjoy an afternoon on the boat, I will say that when the fishing is off, a few snaps are a fine way of amusing one'self.

Just for kicks, here's a little something I dug up from Willy T's archive. Watch out for the Slithering Seprentine Seed of Satan!

Enjoy!!

The Commodore;))

Snake bites girl, 17, in church

By Times Reporter

A SEVENTEEN-year-old girl of Lufwanyama is admitted to Kitwe Central Hospital after she was bitten by a snake which crept into a church building during Sunday worship.
The incident happened in the morning when Mika Washeni of Chief Lumpuma’s area was congregating at a local Kingdom Hall of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
The snake slithered into the hall unnoticed and bit the girl on the hand as she was praying.
The girl screamed and caught the attention of the congregants who immediately killed the serpent.
Hospital public relations officer Gray Chishimba confirmed the incident in an interview yesterday.
He said the girl was taken to the hospital by members of of the Church after administering traditional medicine. He described the condition of the girl as stable.

I Am Not The One!!

The trick with us Africans is that no matter what goes on, we've always got an excuse with which to shift the blame or 'pass the buck', so to speak. And if there's one thing I've learnt living on the river, it's that there's no excuse too far fetched. As long as you insert some element of truth, you can get away with pretty much anything. So as always, I'll start this off with an excuse proportionately far fetched to explain my extended absence:

''But you see Bwana's/Madame's(tick appropriate), sometime back the rains they came and made incredibo' probrems four us guys here.....They have cause'd everything to four down and we have expended the passing months to make the necessary prans and lennovations of which most are ongoing to this date...These lains have also caused communications probrems with the computa systems. But we have managed to lid these systems of the gremrins and are now ready to continue with our updates. Meanwhile, we were forced to celeblate the festivities of chlismass andi also easter. We are very sorry for any inconvenience we have caused within this period. We are wekkin on the probrem andi will be up and lunning anytime from now.''

So there you have it. Not as creative as some of the excuses I've heard, but suitable I'd think for the extended absence. Take what truth you like out of it, the rest I'll try summarise into this update.

Okay, formalties over, let's get on with it. We have indeed had what one can only describe as nothing short of Biblical rains this season. You wouldn't know it if you came to the valley now though. Man the bush dries out quickly once the rains stop.

So, as most of you who know us will already know, we've had to take down half of the camp and go in a new direction. The replacements for the treehouses will now be Meru tents which'll hopefully be here and ready for installation by the end of next week. The rest of the rennovations will go pamono-pamono and will include, a new dining area, a few more tents and the odd bits and bobs around just to make the place a little more 'lodgy'. But for now, progress is impressive and I'm looking forward to the finished product(not that one's ever happy that you've reached the end-product) very much. We've also gone along with things like the staff quarters, finished off the campsites, redone the back of the kitchen and even managed to fix the saggy roof problem we had on the back of the Boma. There are all the little things too, but then most of you aren't interested in that sort of rubbish. At the end of the day, we've got till the 1st of June to get to operational status. A push at this point, but it has to be done and I believe with a few more of the 8hr 'go-come' trips to town, we will manage it.

Otherwise we've had the usual fun & games that go with River Life. A few staff shorter than I used to be and picked up a few stragglers along the way, have left me wondering about the wise old guy that came up the 'better the devil you know' concept. But that too, will be sorted out as time marches on.

In all the chaos there has of course been the odd afternoon or evening to spend wetting a line or taking a few 'snaps' with the new toy. Most noteworhty of late are the 9 & 10kg Cornish Jack we've finally managed to work out how to fish for. Definitely not the hardest fighting fish, but a worthy quarry on a small bream stick and 10lb line. Add to this the 10 million sqeakers, silver barbel and the odd 'zesco' barbel, and it's not too bad a night out when you have nothing better to do. So the season's not too lacking in fish. That's if you ignore the fact that the Tiger that make the Zambezi the angling destination it is, are sadly lacking!! But then maybe we just don't know what we're doing. Haha, not likely!! I like to think that the rains've messed it all up and the super high water is interfering. Well that's what the locals say anyway(last year I was complaining about low water...will we ever be happy??)

All in all, things on The Mighty Zambezi aren't half bad. Our only real irritation presently is that pesky pontoon thingy. If they're not having lunch or morning tea or breakfast or some other form of break, the damn pontoon is on 'break' or more precisely broken. When it does work, it's pretty extreme!! There's nothing quite like the exhilaration of putting your landcruiser on a half-sinking steel bathtub with tractor engines on it and hoping that it's going to make it to the other side of the river. At the moment we get our money's worth though. The 'seagulls' they've got on it for engines aren't strong enough to tackle the torrent that is the Kafue River, so we end up halfway down towards the confluence. Haha, I had to feel for the poor guys who got their vehicles stuck on it just before easter and ended up moored to the bank 300m downriver for three days when one of the engines packed in.

Well I guess that if anyone has managed to read the through the whole of this ramble, they deserve a pat on the back...pat pat!!!

If you just read the beginning and looked at the pictures and read the end....Good Job, the middle was boring!!

I'll try get hold of something from good old WillyT's archive in the coming updates. For now though, watch out there now!!......The Commodore;))

Try Spinning!!!!

One kinda hoped that France were holding the World Cup for Slackers instead of Rugby at the moment...Alas they're not!! So, the Wildchaps will just have to wait till it becomes an olympic sport before entering......On that note, I'm truly sorry for the silence. Hey, look at it this way, if it were truly golden, then we'd be rich as &^$%!!!..haha

What the past six weeks have done though is given me an epic tale for y'all...So grab a d.cap.mog, sit back, and enjoy the tales of Africa.

I figure, as always, it's best to start from what's freshest in my mind....

We've just finshed our latest group of kids. Good week!!! This'd be the second year we've done the leadership program for older students and all went off without a hitch. Either they were really well behaved, or just sneaky enough to get away with stuff without us noticing, I'd like to think it was the former. But an awesome week by any means(we've still got the second half of them at the end of the month though???). I did manage to show this lot how to catch a tiger on command though, which impressed them no end.

Speaking of the tiger. Last week got me a season record!!! Alas, it was, as always, below that elusive 7kg mark, but i reckon 6.8kgs and close on 30minutes of doggish fighting is as good as any man can ask for. Sadly, after a fight like that, I was unable to revive the beast but he went a long way to providing us with the tastiest of treats over a few days.

Generally speaking, summer has hit us with a vengeance and it's brought with it some awesome fishing. Plenty is to be had on all fronts. Except of course the Cornish Jack thingy!! We tried again this full moon and struggled endlessly. Between the mozzies and the squeakers, we're not entirely sure who won out, but it sure as hell wasn't myself or the neighbours !!!

Going back to the week gone by quickly, we had rather a disturbing experience. Something I can't infact joke about!! Anyone who's ever spent time on a boat in Zambia(or freshwater for that fact), knows that very few poeple wear their 'kill-switch'. But, mid-week, I discovered what it's there for. To cut a long story short, we had to rescue some zimbabweans from the water after they came off their boat. Relatively harmless sounding??? Until you see the violence with which a boat goes round and round and round and round without anyone controlling it. Pretty hectic I tell you!!!! But at the end of the day, we were lucky to get everyone involved out of the water safely and they even managed to get the boat back after it eventually ploughed into an island somewhere downstream. Needless to say, I have a new respect for the little red rope I'm s'posed to put round my wrist when driving!!!

As far as other things go, we've abandoned the previous builder(I won't comment on here) and I'll be doing the buying next week in Lusaka for the new guy. After that it's full steam ahead with the renovations and stuff.

Haha...Renovations??? How about rebuilding?? At the moment it seems that everything I look at needs to be redone. We won't talk about the thatch yet cos that's coming soon, but the other day we discovered that due to the staff's 'ingenuity'(i.e. laziness) in deciding not to put the leaf trap in the weir of the pool(cos the filter has one?????) the intake pipe got sooooooo blocked up that we had to dig the whole thing up and pretty much re-do the piping. Idiots!!! I s'pose I should've pre-empted it...but then one can't micro-manage everything??

Mmmmm...hahaha, the list of things that've gone on recently is endless.......take for instance last weekend's trip to town. All keen to do the shopping and not so keen for town I thought I'd leave on Saturday morning at 7am and be back on Sunday afternoon......All well and good?? Until the water pump on the cruiser packed up just after the Kafue Bridge. Stupid thing!!! That put a 3hr delay on my trip which meant a:) I missed the bank, b:) I then had to fight with shoprite to let me pay by check and c:) ?Just a rubbish trip to town........Wake up Peter!!! You Live in Africa...nothing ever goes as planned!!!

Haha, just thinking about Kafue........A couple of week's back, late as usual, I managed to once again have myslef arrested for 'extremerry' dangerous driving. The best part of this experience is that it took the 5'0's all the way to the road-block to catch up with me for an offence I allegedly committed in Kafue town(10km back.....they did phone the raodblock though and I had everyone waiting for me in full uniform, hi-viz, gloves and all!!). Looking back, the only sin I'd committed was passing(a truck going 15kph) on a solid white, not a curve as the fuzz claimed. But then at 17h00 one is not exactly in a position to argue. Ultimately, the most amusing part of the 'negotiation' was when the officer asked me if I would be 'comfortable' if they jst put me in cuffs as an act to show they'd arrested me?????

Man, I'm starting to realise why blogging on a regular basis would benefit me in the long run....this here thang is turning into quite a novel??? And for that reason, I'll fill you in on the other amusing things that've happened(the croc ppl's arrival, Kairara,etc.) when I can over coming weeks.....for now though, it's onto forthcoming attractions....

October is here!!!!! And that means one thing......'Friends only'....As it stands it seems the 'Wildchaps' team, will be only Two ( Myself & Captain Kevin ''mos' deadly'' Macaulay) but I am most confident that we will, as local boys, put on a mighty show and teach the Baha Men from 'the other side' a lesson. We will have to wait and see though, last time I promised potential, we failed miserably. But, come the 20th, we will be M-en O-f S-erious I-ntentions!!!!

Once again my friends, I'm truly apologetic for the slackness, I will indeed try harder in coming weeks to fill you in...

For now though......Rock the boat.....The Commodore;)

Gearing up!

In amongst the preparations for this fortnight's two 5night school camp's, laying water pipes and prepping the new croc site for power & lawn and then of course the obligatory d.cap mog soaked, meaningful, solve all the problems in the world by 2am on Saturday morning, conversation with the bwana, I finally made it out on the water on Sunday afternoon for a test run of the new 'seaclet weepon'. After some not so professional fishing and bloodshed from a wayward cast which caught the wrong side of a rather thorny tree, I finally got serious and tempted this bull of a fish to come out from behind a stump for a tasty treat. Funnily enough, the cast itself was into a hole a croc had just come out of. The fifteen odd minutes that followed had me wondering at times if what I had on the end of the line was in fact a croc, vundu or anything other than 11lbs of tigree. This cheeky bugger stayed well out of sight till just before we netted it. Not a record, but certainly an excellent fight that had me thinking that if it was a tiger, I was finally going to break that elusive 7kg barrier I've come so close to but just can't seem to pass. Whatever size it was, this one and the other strikes I had for the afternoon proved that come the warmer weather and upcoming 'challenges', my new rig is going to devastate the tiger and the competition.

I wasn't the only one to take a noteworthy Tiger this weekend. In fact, when all was said and done, mine was a full pound less noteworthy than that of the Bwana. His 12lber was taken right in front of the lodge on Saturday afternoon and I watched on in horror and jealousy from the boma as it was hauled onto the deck. My only retort to this outrage is that the 12 was taken on a bait whereas the 11 was some classy presentation of a carefully prepared artificial lure, the nature of which I shall not reveal until it is too late for the 'Okavango Okes' to do anything about.

I'm looking forward to spending a bit of time on the water on Saturday afternoon once the latest group departs, honing my skills and seeing what excitment the warm weather and clear water will bring for us.

Moving away from the fishing now and onto the lodge, it seems for now the jumbo have given up digging the water pipes up and are content to just mill around on the property looking for natives to chase or crops to destroy. That's not to say they won't get bored of that and come back to annoying me soon. My latest scheme is to pipe water into a favorite rainy season hippo wallow just outside the campsites to try give them something else to amuse themsleves with. But with the lights and power going into the camping areas this weekend, they should behave a bit better from now on anyway. We'll see!!

Haven't heard much from the builders of late. But they should be or should I say will 'hopefully' be in close to the end of the month to do the long overdue renovations and maintenance on the buildings. Once that's done, we'll be on the right track and better equipped to handle the latest surge in popularity we're having.

For now though, we plod along with the usual routine....Adios Hombres;)) El Commodorrey

The Okavango-Zambezi Challenge

It's been talked about for a long time, but it seems that the boys from the Okavango Delta may finally make it up to the Zambezi to experience some real tigerfishing and to take on the Zambezi Wildchaps at their own game. Will they succeed?

There's been some big talk from the 'Okavango Okes' (their own moniker) but the time is coming when they will have to put their money where their mouths are and show us whether or not they can actually cut it when it comes to chasing those elusive striped water dogs on a real river, or does swamp fishing just entail sitting on an Aliboat, drinking St Louis and waving sticks in the air?

So who's in the challenge?

The Vrdoljak brothers from Team Wildchaps have not been seen on the river together since January, but will still be a force to be reckoned with. The drift fishing technique honed by Pete has proved extremely effective in the past in generating plenty of strikes and some decent sized tiger in the boat. They do of course have home ground advantage, but will this be enough? It could be a tough challenge for the Wildchaps, as there's a lot of pride at stake here.

The Okavango Okes are all ex-members of the crocodile research group in the Okavango and have all spent many hours on the river in Bostswana. In amongst their hectic research schedule they also (allegedly) found some time to develop some fishing skills too.

It's also been a while since the Okes were all on an Aliboat together, so hopefully they haven't lost the touch. Sven 'Grandpappy' Bourquin is finally making the big trek from the Cape to the river this year after many months in front of his PC. Vince 'Vincemate' Shacks is the only team member whose had a chance to keep his hand in with weekend expeditions in the delta, but has he been using that time to practice casting or lifting a beer can? Big Kev Wallace will have spent a bit of time at his new home on the Zambezi, so he may be able to provide the Okes with some valuable Zambezi intel, or at the very least knock together some comfy furniture for the team with his carpentry skills developed during his sojourn in the UK.

What's it all about?
It's all about the tigers of course, and who can get the biggest in the boat! No idiot bait-fishing though, any monkey from Mungwe point can drift down the river dragging a fillet while blasting 'Who let the dogs out?' to all and sundry. House rules are strictly lure-fishing only and catch and release.

December is not exactly prime fishing time as the teams will potentially have to deal with extreme heat, dirty water and wayward Zimbos on the river on top of the usual challenges of chasing tigers, but if everyone is as good as they say they are this should just add some spice to the competition. At the very least December fishing in the past has provided some good times out on the water and in camp, so it ought to be a goody! This will hopefully be the first encounter in a continuing series that may see the Wildchaps trying out their skills in the Delta some time in the future.

We'll keep you all posted!

Looking back....Moving Ahead!!!

If the passing of two full moons counts as many, then it has indeed been 'many moons' since the last update from the river. And under those many moons, much has happened! The silence then due to this increased activity, and not, as some may suspect, in fear of commie spies picking up on sensitive info which may be passed in code from the wildchaps to our army of followers.

The great trek down the Leopard's Hill Road has come and gone. Much sweat and surprisingly few tears were shed over the 50 gruelling kilometres and two nights.

The first night was spent just below Mfundashi mountains in a secluded grove of trees off the road, next to a small river bed. Giving the cyclists a much needed sleep before the up & down of Mfundashi the following day.

Day two's camp was a little less impressive in some sparse mopane woodland somewhere on the valley floor. But it did the job. A Rhombic night adder of size, gave that little extra excitment when making camp.

Day three saw the cyclists doing the longest yet easiest leg back to the camp. Much needed showers and comfy beds were well recieved by all.

The expedition was a roaring success, topped off with what I am told was a magnificent two nights on various islands down The River by canoe. Definitely something that is worth another trip or two in the future!!

Onto all things lodgy. Things have plodded along merrily for the past while. An increase in weekend activity and the odd school group or two has kept everyone on their toes. In amongst all the hubbub, we continue with our endeavours to try get somewhere with maintenance and improvements. The builders have been down to have a look and hopefully all things going according to plan will begin their part within the next few weeks. I've also met with a thatcher who once again is trying to con me into paying insane amounts of money to rethatch the camp. I understand it's going to be expensiv anyway, but the costs we are looking at at the moment are going to force us to explore other avenues, at least for the treehouses anyway. The rest of the camp we'll just have to swallow hard and get it done. Another rainy season with the 'sieves for roofs' we've got at the moment, will not be pleasant.

Most exciting, is the arrival of the 'Earthwatchers' end of the month. They'll be spendingat least two years with us as a base of operations for their croc research. We're definitely looking forward to having them here. If nothing else, at least there'll be some regular company as opposed to the usual touri who breaze in and out.

On the fishing side of things there's been precious little time to actually get out on the water and fish. The time I have spent out there is time with other people and having to dodge flayling Effzets and untangle lines or land fish leaves little more than a cast or two for myself when the 'Effzet Ninjas' have given up flayling. That's not to say there haven't been fish. A few nice 8-10lber's have been boated of late so there is still hope for a good cold season. I'm hoping to hit the water tomorrow afternoon an mount a serious assault om some of the runs just down from the camp where the Ninjas have been losing out on some good strikes.

Sticking with all things Wild for a bit. Our recent plague of Jumbo in and around the camp, is showing no signs of letting up and every night they seem to get a little bolder. Their latest trick is to frollick in the water below chalet I in the early evening before they move off into the campsite for some fun & games trashing trees and fiddling with my water pipes. It's great to have them here, but they can be a bit of a menace at times. Had an incident on Thursday morning with a youngish bull who decided the cruiser wasn't going to pass untill he'd done enough shouting at it for it to know that he's the boss.

Ah, most exciting news!!! Yes, I have my cruiser back. The old tank is looking spiffing with her 'maluti white' paint job, flat black chassis and chrome flicker unit. Alas at the moment, the pimp flicker is only one, but just as soon as the other arrives and I find some time to have a new bull-bar fitted, it'll be pimped out and ready to cruise the Lower Zambezi, head held high. It is nice though to have the practicality of the cruiser back and be able to cart insane amounts of sand for the bank again.

Upcoming events include the annual Kairara Gova festival in early September which this year is being held for three full days to celebrate the Chieftainesses 20th year of reign. We've also got the first hosting of 'Friends Only', a fishing compo to be held in October. That one should be a goodie!!!

So for now, or for as many moons as it takes for me to get round to filling you all in again........Take a leaf out of Team Member Sven's book(above) and Take it easy...The Commodore

Under Pressure!!

I am most disgusted (as I'm sure most of you are) that I don't have a picture of the jetty in all it's glory!! For the endless months and harping on about it, you'd expect me to have hundreds of them. Alas, I have only the unvarnished product, but I'm sure you can envisage the finished version. I will try remember to pop down tomorrow and get some of it.

Things have been ploddong along merrily for the last week or so. The most recent group of kids, had (or at least led to me to believe they did) a wonderful time. It was refreshing to have such a small and interactive group.

School's out for a bit, so it's giving me a spot of extra time in camp as opposed to being on the road or roaming around Manda Hill doing the shopping. And excting things are happening!! Today (and I don't know why I'm so excited about it but I am!!), we managed to install the 'uber'-pressure pump, which has been a roaring success (for now??) and boosted the water pressure phenomenally. I'm still waiting for the blowout and frustrating aftermath though cos the installation was a little tooo smooth. But fingers crossed it'll all stay as is and present no further problems. This does of course mean that we are in a different league to other lodges (well at least according to The Madam's philosophy) as we are now a lodge without, or at least with very few water problems....Haha, I hear ominous music and drumrolls followed by 40days and 40nights of burst pipes, no water or some other frustration concerning H2O...

Other Excellent news is that last weekend was well spent sitting in the empty pool trying out all manner of Pratley products on the cracks. For now(and that's a big FOR now), the pool is not leaking....at all. So now that we've already crossed fingers for the 'Uber'-pump, it's time to cross toes or something for the pool and bank movement.

Does it sound like I've had any time for fishing?? I'll admit that although I've been 'lus' to put the boat in the water, I've been lazy!! Not only that, I've been feeling a bit downtrodden having destroyed 4 rather costly fishing rods in as many weeks. Granted three of them were as a direct result of 30tonnes of cement, and the other succumbed to the jaws of 'The Hound', but it has nonetheless dampened my fishing spirit. It's somewhat encouraging though that the afternoon boat for this week's camp lost 5 good fish in two hours so I've tentatively set aside Sunday afternoon for some Simply Wildness and going to launch a Diabolical assault on the Tigrees.

In parting, here's something a little something I dug out of Intrepid WW's stash, I'm not entirely sure if it's been in before. My apologies if it has.....

For now, Under Pressure, The Commodore;))

Suspected thief blinded

AN instant justice mob of Mupata village in Mpulungu on Tuesday night beat up and pierced the eyes of a suspected thief from the same village after he allegedly attempted to steal from the house of one of the villagers.
A check by ZIS at Mpulungu police station today found the unnamed man lying in pain with a blood-smeared face as a mob of angry youths chanted slogans in solidarity with the action taken against the man at a distance.
One of the youths spoken to expressed satisfaction at the action of the villagers saying the suspect was known for his thieving activities.
He said the action would also serve as a warning to all those contemplating thieving activities in Mupata, a village notorious in theft cases.
The suspected thief was only saved by patrolling police officers last night and police say they have launched investigations in the matter.-- Zana/ZIS